14 Nov 2004 // An interview by Shade
1. Who are your favourite New Zealand musicians/bands?
Daphne Walker, Skeptics, Sir Howard Morrison, Seven Dials, Jungle Fungus, the Auckland CBD Liquor Ban.
2. Who would you most like to support live?
UB40, U2, Heaven 17, Level 42, Sum 41, Blink 182, 48May, R2D2, C3PO and Bob Log III.
3. What is the strangest thing that has happened to you while playing on tour?
Someone fell over and peach teats.
4. Where do you see Meat-Bix in 5 years?
Split up due to artistic differences - desperately trying to earn some cash by releasing a best-of/remix album.
5. What advice would you give other budding musicians/bands?
Handpuppet says: boring is bad. having not-fun is bad. everything else can be made to work.
The Gaylord Jesus says: Don't bother; you will never be as good as us.
Tennessee Pussy says: Play brandishing a camel-toe. It gives you street cred (word!).
Dogfhart says: no comment
Little Known Facts about Meat-Bix
1. On average, people fear Dogfharts more than they do regular fharts.
2. Banging your knob against Derek uses 6 calories an hour.
3. Ronald Reagan's son invented sodomizers. Meat-Bix perfected them.
4. In every episode of The A-Team there is a facelift gone bad somewhere. And there is a Brian.
5. Hand Puppets only blink one eye at a time (but uses all three arms to drum).
6. The upcoming summer tour will be sponsored by Jehovah's Witnesses.
7. The Gaylord Jesus can conjugate verbs for 3 years without any coleslaw.
8. Women painstakingly flail nearly twice as much as men. This ratio is 7 to 1 when referring to Tennessee Pussy.
9. Gordon Lightfoot was banned from New Zealand because he wouldn’t wear a bloodied Meat-Bix shirt. Sticky has been appointed defender of Meat-Bix because she would.
10. The average poo has 6 standing ovations in it. A Meat-Bix concert has at least that many.